HEED

Therefore we ought to give the more earnest heed to the things which we have heard, lest at any time we should let them slip. HEBREWS 2:1, KJV. 

So we must listen very carefully to the truth we have heard, or we may drift away from it. HEBREWS 2:1, NLT.  

There is something about seasons that makes them more than an experience. I don't know what exactly it is. Perhaps it's the manner in which every experience is perfectly orchestrated to pass across a divine message. Sometimes the message(s) being passed across is fresh other times it's a reinforcer. Irrespective of the category the message belongs to I like that it's always an evidence of the father's love that renews our love for the father, deepens our faith, revives our hope, empowers us for the journey and reveals more of the father's will. Having gone through the silent, wordy, dry and flourishing seasons more times than I can number all I can say is I can't enough because there is always more. More ways God will express Himself. More words to hear. More understanding to gain. There is more of everything. I have learnt however that more than the Word I want to hear, I should pay attention to the medium at which the message would be and is being conveyed.

Words will just be words until the mysteries hidden in them are unraveled. Let's talk practical guys. By the way it's been a while, howdy?😊

God has been saying a lot to me but I didn't realize it until one day in september when I dreamt. I have always dreamt but this one dream had and still has a strong grip on me. In the dream I was pregnant. I wasn't pregnant as a married woman but as a teenager. The pregnancy was a shock to me but the greater shock for me was my family's reaction to it. I didn't understand why they were cool with it. I couldn't even name who was responsible but they took special care of me.

So I put to bed and delivered twins (yay! I love twins) but something wasn't right. During the delivery there was no blood, I didn't have to push hard, it was easy, really easy. Then the midwives showed me my babies. I didn't get to see them clearly but the glimpse I saw of them was beautiful. I carried them to see them better and bond but my vision was clouded. Notwithstanding I could tell they were chubby, beautiful and healthy babies and from the initial glimpse my heart was theirs. Love is nothing compared to what I felt for the twins.

The next thing I saw was myself at a place that can be likened to the mall. It seemed like it was a festive period and sales were going on. I was on the queue waiting for my turn when my mum who was supposed to be watching after the twins came towards me. At this point I was worried because I left the twins sleeping. There was a possibility they could have woken. Who would look after them? why is she at the mall? were the questions ringing in my head. After she had approached I posed a couple of questions at her and her responses threw me off balance. She told me the twins weren't mine (what? I mean... come again. You said?) and yes I was pregnant but I didn't deliver children it was an empty pregnancy.  She said the real parents of the twins had taken them home. I was telling her to stop joking around when I woke up.

Now that I have your full attention. Let me warn you to prepare yourselves for a really long read.

What could this dream mean? Why would I be denied of what belongs to me? were the questions I kept asking myself when I woke up. The more I pondered on the dream the uneasier I became and of course the more I prayed but the interpretation wasn't forthcoming. So I decided to interpret it in my human understanding(wrong!). I thought God was telling me I would bear twins in the future (Oh I so love twins😍. I have even prayed about them). But why would I bear them now? that would translate to fornication. I can't bring myself to conceive thougths that pertain to fornication talk less of doing the act. My body is the temple of the Most High. Besides the Holy Spirit is doing a great job in helping me stay celibate so what is this coming out of the blue? Would I have pseudocyesis when it's time to conceive? Is God telling me I will be barren? No! No!! No!!! God won't allow that. I am His beloved. That's how I started forbidding, rejecting, rebuking, casting and so on. When I eventually calmed down the Holy Spirit broke down the dream to me.

He said the pregnancy and it's acceptance signifies purpose and it's appreciation. That was the reason why I was pregnant as a teenager. Purpose is no respecter of age. My parents didn't complain nor bother themselves about who was responsible for the pregnancy but took special care of me because the pregnancy is no ordinary pregnancy. It's purpose and I am operating in my divine placement. No need for questions! The kids refer to the manifestation of purpose. The simple delivery process signifies the ease that comes with the manifestation. He went further to say I have the ability to bear fruit. Matter of fact, when I do, they will be as desirable as the kids that I saw but I won't bear any fruit (at that time) because I was void.  He told me the reason why I didn't see the babies clearly was because I had not started manifesting and the glimpse was to show me what manifestation looks like. He further said I went about looking like I was pregnant with purpose when in reality I was empty. Void. Containing nothing. Barren. He talked of how I needed to be filled up and how I have to position myself for filling. The repercussion of remaining void was someone else bearing the fruits that are supposed to be mine. In that moment as you can imagine I was weak. The revelation zapped me. Everything happened so fast. The switch from natural to supernatural in that moment was faster than the speed of light. The Holy Spirit wasn't lying I was actually void. I knew I was. I had been running low. I found it difficult to pray, worship and study the Word. I felt useless because in all sincerity things were hard for me even the simplest of things. But there in the kitchen the Holy Spirit made bare my life. My life! I have forsaken the world for Christ if I can't be found in Christ or the fullness of Christ not embodied in my being just what am I living for? What would become of me? Eh, I cried and cried and cried so hard, I tried as much as I could to mumble words of prayers but I couldn't find the right words to pray and so I cried more and let my tears do the talking. I was really weak. More than the fact that I was brought to the consciousness of my situation and the offering of a filling I was crying because God is ever faithful. The fact that He never leaves me in my sorry state does something in me that I will never comprehend.

The wow factor for me was the fact that it didn't end there. The Holy Spirit went all out to reinforce the revelation. He resonated His words with everything around me. That same september the annual youth camp organized by my church was themed "fruitful". The scripture reference was taken from John 15:7-8 but it made more sense to me from verse 1. It tells us how Jesus is the vine and we are the branches. The branch won't bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine. The same way I won't bear fruit unless I abide in Him. The word abide was the message. Prior to the dream I had forsaken my secret place. I was far away from the presence of God and lost in myself. God wouldn't allow that so He reminded me of the essence of of my existence. Abiding. It's in abiding that I can overcome the barrenness and bear fruits.

I didn't just dream about barrenness and the youth camp wasn't just themed fruitful, I was to sing "fill me up" by Tasha Cobbs at camp. Whaaat? God was coming for me like... Why was it me that was chosen to sing that song? Of all the songs in the medley? Fill me up is the exact thing my heart had been crying out. Coincidence? No that was divine. It could only be divine! There was this time we were singing fill me up during rehearsals and the dream kept replaying in my mind as we sang so I placed my hands on my belly prophesying in my mind while singing along. At the end of the song the other choristers were making jokes and laughing at what I did. It was funny so I laughed along with them but in my Spirit I was saying it's not actually funny, if only you know, if only you know what I know you'll join your hands with mine and prophesy that song into me better still you'll do it for yourselves. Everything was so real to me. Everything. The fact that God used the things that occupied my mind (camp, choir rehearsal, camp) to speak to my Spirit man knowing I could push aside the dream and belittle it's significance meant so much to me.

Here is where heed comes to play. Pay heed!

The major lesson from this encounter was the medium of communication. God's medium of communication. I have made the mistake (severally) of limiting God's voice. He could be speaking to me through a song but I would want Him to speak through a dream so I wouldn't press in. I have dreamt numerous times but I haven't gotten the message being passed across more than half of the time because I didn't think God would speak to me through my dreams because "lol me? Pregnant? Lool" "what kind of weird things are these? God is not the author of confusion. He won't speak through this" and so on. I have realized now that as I mature God will pass across His message in an advance format because I am transitioning from babe to son (daughter actually). Revealing the answers to the questions on my heart with the simplest yet the most unlikely things. For instance, His use of pregnancy and my love for twins to reveal my former state of spiritual barrenness. The allegory(pregnancy for fruitfulness/purpose, twins for fruit/manifestations) didn't correlate with my thought because I interpreted pregnancy to be a result of fornication. God was actually passing a clear message with what I thought unlikely. Now that I know this I have stopped expecting God to tell me "da-da" when He means "daddy".

I won't lie that it's tougher deciphering the medium in which God is passing His message because He speaks with all things. Honestly, it's really not funny not knowing what God is saying. I mean you can only know the content when you have the container. I have however learnt that in the silence, the piercing silence, that state where I don't know the medium or the message, when it feels like He has abandoned me, God speaks. In fact, He speaks volume in the silence (note that it wasn't until I calmed down and flowed with the silence that He interpreted the dream to me). I therefore need more spiritual vigilance to know what I need to know so that I can heed to the message and then do what He wills. It's in heeding that I know the medium. It's also in heeding that I discover the message. It's in heeding the Word that I do the Father's will. It's in doing the Father's will that I grow and have depth. That of course is not without the help of the Holy Spirit.

Heed.

M A N D A T E : Pay attention He is speaking. In nature, in music, in your dreams, in the fleeting images, in your inspiration, His voice is resounding. Give heed to His words by listening and doing. Heed.